December Love Song
by Apnea
Summary: You're the last person I thought I'd find here, Athrun. His name foreign in her lips. So long she hadn't spoken his name... Asucaga oneshot. Read


**Disclaimer: **Gundam seed or its characters do not (regrettably) belong to me. The only thing that I can stand behind is the plot of the following story. The wonderful song _December Love Song_ the inspiration to this (crappy) piece of writing, also if you haven't yet noticed the title to the fic belongs to _Gackt. _This was written for pure fun, meaning, I'm not getting anything out of this. Flames or constructive criticism **ARE** highly welcomed (not wanted, but welcomed), yet be nice and try to help out not bring down.

Any comments or thoughts; _Read & Review._

The moon had chosen to hide her face from the world that night, overpowering his sense of loneliness. The sky black and vast over him void of any decoration except that of the falling snow. The snow that silently and gently fell onto the ground below. Milky powder making playful patterns as it was blown with the night's cool breeze. Regardless of the time, parks were filled with young children who creatively built snow forts, snow mans, snow angels, and any other snow included specialty, their parents also helping along. Couples walking down the busy avenues hand in hand, the lights shone brightly giving the sense of life and celebration. But even the Christmas decorations couldn't fill the gap in his heart.

He passed a couple, who so luckily and by fate had been placed under a mistletoe, and where currently in the middle of a make out session. '_Get a room'. _He was annoyed. Everything about this place or any other place he went to, whatever he saw, whatever he heard, EVERYTHING, reminded him of her. That certain someone that he had "let go" (which most accurately should say given up on) and couldn't get back, and knowing that, he still couldn't let her go; his heart yearned for no other. Kisses he had shared with other girls in the past year meant nothing, were nothing compared to how his heart soared whenever he remembered one of her kisses late at night accompanied only by the moon and his thoughts. That certain someone whom he had this burning desire to hold again even though he knew it was practically impossible. If only for a minute, he could hold her in his arms and confess to her that he still loved her and would always love her. But he knew that they had both made their choices and as painful as the outcome had been he couldn't take back what he'd done.

And for some odd reason he continued to walk down the street, feeling slightly out of place. Looking for something he may never find. He could have easily gone home and spend a quite evening with the TV set or he could have taken up any of the offers made by Kira and Lacus or the Hawkeye sisters. But he didn't have the courage to see her face (although he later learned she had cancelled on their invitations also…her excuse, WORK). He wouldn't know what to say, although he knew what he wanted to say. He was a coward... someone who could get onto a Gundam and fight in two mayor world wars and come out alive and kicking, yet could not come face to face with his own feelings could be considered a coward. He'd rather stay alone if he couldn't be with the one he loved.

Although that might have not been what she would have wanted? She would scold him about being left alone to think. Left alone to be plagued by his thoughts, but at the moment he didn't have anyone to drive them away.

He watched another couple in the middle of a snow filled garden, a small band of violin players around them, playing a romantic tune as the guy proposed to the blushing girl. Pulling a diamond out of his pocket he asked for her hand, holding his breath while waiting for her answer. Tears ran down the girl's cheek as she covered her face with her right hand, half crying, half smiling. Then she shyly nodded her head, up and down and whispered halve mumbled the "yes" the poor guy on his knees-now wet with snow-had been longing to hear. Surely, it was a small price to pay for a hopeful life time of happiness. The man swept the girl of her feet and spun her, her laugh reverberating from the buildings as the people around them applauded, Athrun included. Her laugh remained him of Cagalli, and he couldn't help but feel a bit jealous. He remembered the day before he left for ZAFT once again, how he'd given her the ring, how he kissed her goodbye yet promising to return... funny how things turned out in the end. At times he wondered if she still felt for him as he felt for her, but some questions go on forever without being answered and his, was probably no exception. The crowd that had gathered around the couple wavered. As the cold breeze chilled his bones he too left the scene.

She had escaped the clutches of work just in time to make it out before she was caught, and forced to spend time with a whole bunch of people. Not that it mattered but at the moment she wanted to be alone. She wanted to be depressed and not have to put up a smile for her family. She wanted to think. She walked aimlessly having no place in particular to go to. She made her way down a busy shopping district, her knee long red jacket, red gloves, and hat weren't doing much to warm her up. But hey, who was complaining, she wanted out and now she was out. Although she regretted it immediately as she laid eyes on a couple who had apparently attracted a currently dissipating crowd. They were walking out of a snow filled garden hand in hand. The rock on the girl's left hand caught her attention. 'Wow, whatever happened to modesty'. The slightly shorter girl wrapped around the guy, who had his arms around her as well, protecting her, as she once was protected by someone whom she loved...and to her demise still loved.

It was depressing, how even after a year of complete separation she still suffered by the mere thought of him, every night caught in a tangled mess of nightmares, and everyday her thoughts drifted to what could have been.

He'd probably moved on, and she wouldn't be mad if he had. Actually, she'd be pissed as hell, but she knew there was nothing she could do. It had been her choice after all, duties first, Athrun later. It was too much to ask of anyone, to ask of him, but she had obviously driven him to a corner. Whenever she remembered all the things he had given up for her she had this urge to pull her hair out with her bare hands. That's why she didn't fight back, because she had understood that she was holding him back, _actually,_ she didn't want to hold him down from what his heart desired. She understood that if she wasn't what he wanted she would let him go with a smile on her face standing straight with her hands behind her back, holding the broken pieces of her heart.

Like they say, if you love something let it go, if it returns to you it was truly meant to be yours and it was yours all along, or something like that. Too bad she couldn't help to feel selfish about it, If you want it and you have it, keep it, take it home, leave it under lock and key, because it's yours and no one will take it away from you or worst it won't go away on it's own.

She made her way back to reality and noticed that she had been staring off into oblivion and people where beginning to stare She slowly walked away from the garden and her current thoughts. Taking one last glance over the empty space, "satisfied" with what she saw, she made here way down the street.

She walked staring into the vast sky trying to catch the falling snow on her tongue a failed attempt. Every damned flake was missing the target by a mile. She almost bumped into a man. Brushing his shoulder, without looking or paying much attention to who it was

"I'm sorry" she said not catching the guy's young features or midnight hair and continued strolling down the street paying no mind to the world around her

Making his way back from his night's walk, he'd stopped in one of the stores which held a TV on the display window and was currently flashing a news report on the representative's latest project of creating a home for the children who had been orphaned by the wars. Her confidence showed through the screen as she delivered her proposition speech, still a little nervous. Something he found awfully cute and adorable. His heart soared at her smile when she had finished and the people began to applaud. She hadn't realized that the day she gave that speech he'd been there to see her.

He left the store window and continued to walk, no point in making himself any more miserable (if that was even possible at this point). He walked for a while then, really felt the cold and reached in his pockets for his gloves; he fidgeted around unable to find them. Lowering his sight, to actually look inside the damned pockets, he bumped into a young girl, dropping his gloves on the floor. Looking up quickly to hear her say "I'm sorry" and continue to walk.

_There he'd found them, the wretched things... _

Wait

That voice, He knew that voice

"_Ms. Representative?" _she stopped dead in her tracks, she brought her head up to attention and looked to find a young girl and her father staring at her. Both whom looked very much like people she'd known_... Father…? No, she chose to ignore the resemblance. _The cold was really getting to her.

"_Hello there, what's your name?" Cagalli spoke to the young girl_

"_Dawn" _

_Taken back by the girls name Cagalli stood there. The name itself brought too many memories._

_She smiled_

"_Dawn, huh?, that's a beautiful name. I knew someone whose name was very close to that"_

"_Really?" the young girl inquired elated_

"_Yeah" she smiled at the girl's enthusiasm_

"_Do you love him?" the little girl suddenly asked_

"_I'm-" _

"_Do you love him?"_

"_He holds a very special place in my heart. Even now I still..." she was inclined to answer_

"_Wait, how did you?"_

"_Go get him"_

"_What?"_

That voice was definitely hers. He turned to the girl in red, blond hair peeking out from under her hat.

"_Cagalli?"_

_She turned around and was shocked to find the face who was staring back at her. She turned her attention back at the man and girl who were no longer there but had already continued on their way. She watched them go, watch them fade into the crowd the girl turned around one last time and laughed. Cagalli smiled._

"_Cagalli?"_

_She smiled at him, her prince in red._

"_You're the last person, I thought I'd find here, Athrun." his name foreign in her lips. So long she hadn't spoken his name._

_He smiled back, taking in the sight of her, of his goddess._

_They stood there just staring into one another's eyes, in complete silence._

_Until..._

"_Do, do you want to go get some coffee?" he'd asked rather hesitantly _

"_Sure" she had answered with the same awkwardness_

_They were laughing like small children, talking about Kira's latest scheme. How he was about to become a father and was going insane. They were at a small local cafe, one that was frequently visited by Athrun. She took a sip of her dark coffee while he stared at her. She felt his stare burn into her..._

"_What, do I have something on my face?"_

"_No"_

"_Then?" she, obviously agitated interrogated _

_He smiled at her short temper...no, she hadn't change _

"_Nothing" he smirked and took a sip out of his own coffee_

_She gave him a dirty look_

"_If looks could kill" he whispered_

"_If looks could kill, you'd be six feet under, and then some" she retorted, smiling_

"_I know" he said_

"_Aahh, fresh air" she smiled at the night sky. The snow ceased to fall and they had made their way out of the café and started strolling down the street until Cagalli, all too excited claimed she wanted to go to the park, the park with the biggest hill and steepest slope. They had just made their way up that certain hill. Her jeans were wet up to the knee as well as his. She spun in place. He smiled._

"_Freedom!" she exclaimed getting closer to the edge looking at the world beneath them "I haven't had a vacation in a long time" she turned to him and smiled then turned to look again._

"_I can tell" he said getting closer to her also diverting his attention to the world below. But remaining slightly behind her, a habit he had developed during his days as Alex Dino._

"_How?" she challenged not looking back at him_

_He got a tad bit closer to her and whispered almost in her ear_

"_Because I can see it in your eyes"_

_She turned around, slowly meeting his gaze _

_tears where beginning to form behind her golden orbs, his gaze gentle, and what she saw behind them scared her...was that guilt and... She was moving forward, towards him and he wasn't holding back. Their lips barely centimeters apart, she flinched at the last moment and forgetting where she was stepped backwards._

_She waited for a fall that never came. Instead she was clinging to his shirt for dear life, his chest rising and falling rapidly against her cheek, his heart beating ecstatically on her ear. Both of his arms wrapped protectively around her. They both had been given a fright. _

_They stood there taking in the scent of each other _

_Then unexpectedly the ground below them gave away. _

She had closed her eyes as hard as she could. The scream she had wanted to let out, caught in her throat and refused to come out. They rolled down the hill, but never once did he let go of her. He instead protected her from the worst of the fall. When she felt they weren't rolling anymore she slowly opened her eyes to find Athrun over her, staring intently at her.

"_Are you okay, Cagalli?" _

"_Yeah" _she nodded. She had tried to get up but the world around her spun out of place, she closed her eyes.

She felt Athrun's hand on her cheek and she opened her eyes once more. His eyes worried.

"_I'm fine...Just a terrible headache"_

She put her hands back supporting herself, pushing herself up, Athrun moved back. His dishevel hair over his face as well as hers. His white shirt completely see through (since it was wet), through his opened jacket. Her mouth half opened, eyes staring_. 'Temptation, bad temptation,' _she looked away quickly before she was caught staring.

He stood up and brought out his hand to help her, which she gladly accepted

_They walked in silence, a couple of inches apart._

_They were heading towards his apartment-house._

_When they got there, he couldn't help but look at her with a questioning gaze. She didn't look too good. She was shivering._

"_Good night" she said "it was great...fun...even the fall" she smiled awkwardly _

"_Ahh, yeah" he said also smiling. Still looking at her, her gaze to the floor now_

"_Do you want to-" _

_The words were out before he'd even thought about them, but she'd cut him off_

"_Achooo!!!" _

_She sneezed, shivers running up and down her spine _

_He caught sight of this_

_Before she had time to protest he had wrapped his arms around her once more and was pulling her up the stairs._

"_What?"_

"_Do you seriously think I will let you go home by yourself?"_

"_Yes…I can take care of myself, thank you very much."_

"_Nah, your wet from head to toe, we're about an hour and a half away from the manor plus it's starting to snow again. I think you should stay here tonight."_

_She looked at him, then up at the sky. Where she clearly saw the snow flurries descending, she couldn't even think due to the headache_

"_I don't want anything to happen to you. I want you to… Stay. At least until tomorrow, then I can drive you home and I'll be 100 sure you're safe." he said, looking down to the floor_

_And she was sold. She found her feet leading her up the steps. He looked up at her as she waited beside him in front of the door._

"_Well, are you going to open the door or not?" she smiled_

_He smiled back at her and pushed the key through the lock._

_They sat in front of the fire place with hot cocoa (courtesy of Athrun Zala). He'd change into something comfortable and dry and gave her one of his shirts and two blankets to keep her warm. He looked at her as she sipped her chocolate. _

"_You keep looking at me like that"_

"_Did the pain reliever kick in yet?"_

"_Yeah...thanks" _

_She stared into the fire, he followed her gaze._

_She turned to look at the piano on the far right side of the room_

"_You still play?" she asked him_

_He stared at her like she had ground three heads. Then he realized what she was talking about_

"_Yeah, a little"_

_With a smirk on his lips he headed towards the stool and placed his fingers on the cool marble keys and began to play a gentle melody. A sad tone, simple yet complex, words wouldn't be necessary._

_He poured all of his emotions onto the piece, all the things he couldn't tell her. He wanted her to know that… he stilled loved her and he wanted a second chance to make things right._

_Finishing the song, a song Cagalli knew all too well because he had played it for her, this particular piece many times before. A year after the first a war he'd taken up piano again, when he was convinced that the ghost's from his past would not re-surface. He'd dedicated this piece to her on a stormy night when neither of them could manage sleep. _

_Tears in her eyes, she dared to ask_

"_What happened to us Athrun?" her voice barely beyond a whisper_

'_Caught off guard, that was an unexpected turn of events.' Athrun thought, his gaze not leaving the piano._

"_I mean, we were so in love and then...where we really together a year ago? It seems like an eternity even though it's been only a year."_

_She looked to the ground _

_he was speechless, he had been avoiding, more like dreading this moment for the past year and here it was, it all came down to this._

"_I... never stopped loving you, Athrun... But I think you did" he looked up to meet her gaze, tears ran down here cheeks._

_He stood there not able to move, did she just say love, 'she still loves me'?_

"_I have to go"_

_Mistaking his inability to speak or move as rejection. _

_She stood up and went to get her stuff._

_He had barely enough time to catch her before she went to the other room to get her belongings._

_He caught her wrist and turned her around to face him._

_She slammed her small yet effective fists at his chest. Trembling hands slamming hard on him but he could care less about the pain. He just held her closer._

_Crying she let out all of her frustrations._

"_WHY? ATHRUN WHY? WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO? WHY DIDN'T YOU COME BACK? I LOVED YOU AND I WAITED, EVERYDAY I WAITED, FOR ONE YEAR. AND I'M STILL WAITING. WHY COULDN'T YOU HAVE TOLD ME NO, WHY DID YOU JUST GO WITHOUT KNOWING HOW I FELT... YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT ME, NOT LEAVE ME ALONE. THAT WAS THE PROMISE, ATHRUN, WASN'T IT? IT WASN'T OVER FOR ME AND IT STILL ISN'T OVER!!!!!"_

_She crumbled to the ground where he caught her. She stopped hitting him and buried her beaten face in her hands and cried._

_He didn't know when his own tears started to fall, how she could, even for a minute think he didn't love her anymore. _

_Her mumbled voice reached his ears _

"_Why did you break the promise?" _

_He tilted her face to meet his eyes, her eyes pleading, for him to leave her in her misery._

"_I'm sorry, Cagalli" he whispered, she broke into tears again and tried to hide her face but he wouldn't let her, he grabbed both sides of her face..._

"_I never wanted to let you go. I was stupid and selfish yet I have always been there in the shadows, if push came too shove if it turned into a mass war, for you, I would be there. To protect you and that which you solely believe in, what we all believe in. That was my reason, that's why I could go on, because I was fighting for you... I left and didn't think of coming back because I thought you'd be better off without me, someone who couldn't make up his mind. You deserved better Cagalli, better than me"_

"_Idiot, that's my choice" she whispered "How could you have almost let me marry Yuuna, because you thought HE was better for me, better than YOU?" _

"_No, but if it was your choice"_

_She laughed_

"_My choice, there I was waiting for you to wreak havoc and get me out of that wedding. Take me in your arms and then having us sail away into the sunset while everyone watched." _

"_I kind of had that picture too" he confessed "but I must admit I thought farther than just sunset watching"_

_Cagalli blushed three different shades of red_

_He laughed, a heartfelt laugh _

_She looked up and smiled "But..."_

"_But, if I have realized something in the past year, the one thing I'm sure about, the thing I've made up my mind about since I met you was that...I love you Cagalli Yula Athha and nothing and no one can change that…No one."_

_He brought his lips to hers._

_Passion, Lust, desire, sadness, happiness, anger for the time lost, hope for the future, and above all love. All the emotions they felt at that moment together in one kiss._

_Gasping for air but not breaking apart. _

_She was his reason for being and he was hers. She didn't want to let him go, not now, not ever. He was going to stay under lock and key from now on. _

His breathing hard on her neck, her lips swollen, hair disheveled, clothes forgotten. They were lost in each other. The moon who had finally decided to grace the world with her face made one silhouette, one shadow in the dark room.

Whatever life had in store for them next, whatever destiny had planned for them, it didn't matter, because they lived for moments like this, moments in which they were lost in each other…in their love. Together, they could face any obstacles. That was what they lived for, for each other. It was their love song.

They're lives united, intertwined, by that chance encounter on that deserted island so long ago.

If destiny had brought them together just the same it would make sure they'd stay together, for eternity.

Because it was pure love like the one they shared that could make anything possible...


End file.
